Deborah grew up in the years of the 2nd WW with all the problems. Deborah is a JEW.

This fact is of great importance. Everyone thinks that the Americans never had antisemitic thoughts. But little Deborah had to fight against these foughts until she couldn´t take it any longer. So she made herself a world without war and right wing activists and called it YR. Yr is land with a different time and calendar and with a DIFFERENT language. Deborah hides herself in this “land” to escape from the problems which concern her most. Despite this fact Deborahs parents take her into a hospital in the land where she gets to know Dr. Fried a female psychologist who tries to help her. The complete control of the collect, so she calls the emperors of Yr, causes an uncertainty which makes it impossible for her to bring up a relationship . For every attempt they punish her.

At this point I should perhaps introduce you io the land of Yr. Lactaemon and Anterrabae, the Censors who try to hide her from the world are the ones who hurt her. With the sentence “You´re not one of them.” they try to explain her that she is different. and Deborah believes. You have to imagine that these figures exist only in her imagination. Obviously she doesn´t want to live in the real world. Deborah herself built up this kingdom with all it´s fascinating and terrifying horror. Dr. Fried who always tries to be a good friend to her, helps Deborah wherever it is possible. Lactaemon calls her Furii, that is the Yri word for firebird. The language consists more or less of fragments of german, french and english (slang). in several meetings in Furii´s room Deborah shows more and more of her secret kingdom. And one more thing is getting obvious. She focuses every problem into one person. Her Father. Although her father never treated her bad, she is afraid of him.

The longer the treatment of Deborah lasts, the more sick she gets. One day she tries to commit suicide. She takes a cigarette and burns holes into her skin and then tries to burn herself. (-->Furii - Firebird)

She is put on D -Ward the place with high security in the hospital. There she meets Carla and Helen, also some “insane sick people” as she calls them . She builds up a relationship. That helps her to get into distance with Yr. The collect, as she calls the assembled members of Yr, protest. But the world has grabbed Deborah. One spring morning she can go out into the garden of the hospital. She finds a different world to Yr and that helps her immeditately. Her behaviour improves. She is nearly normal, and is allowed to go home for five days.

But at home everything is different. Her parents and relatives and her sister, they all try to be as polite as possible and that causes sometimes a very tensed situation. Every night she has to take sedatives, but one night at home she hears a disput about her and she feels that she is not wanted anymore. She returns to hospital in a different mood. She changes her parents. Dr. Fried and one young student psychologist Dr. Halle are now the new parents.

One day Carla and Deborah go out and return very late. But they decide to return a bit later and run away. But they come back. They are put in seperate rooms. But the reaction of the doctors is different to their expectations.

Deborah and Carla get more privileges. Deborah wants to start a career because they take her in the A Ward, the rooms with the lowest security measures. She signs in at high school. She has to pass an exam but Dr. Fried and Dr. Halle help her in her struggle to come into high school and finally she passes.

With the help of her social worker she gets more and more sane. Finally she finishes her relationship with Yr. She complains that she is “ONE OF THEM” and with one single Good bye the kingdom of Yr disappears forever.

You may wonder about the strange title “I never promised you a rose garden” At one meeting when Deborah says that she wants to escape from Yr Dr. Fried says “ You´re a remarkable girl. But remember my words when you´re out in the reality: I never promised you a rose garden, I never promised you justice, I never said, that it will be easy for you!” These sentences were one of the most moving sort. I have to say that I never read such a good book. If someone has time to read it please, read it . I think the one will never say again “Look at this fool he behaves like an insane.”

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Liviu Rebreanu Liviu Rebreanu
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